5 Assertiveness Skills I Learned
from Powerful Women
I have been lucky enough to be surrounded by inspiring women who modeled assertiveness skills *flawlessly*. Learning to be assertive starts with self-perception. Assertive women don’t just make their voices heard, they change the very frequency of the conversation. Assertiveness is an art, refined into a skill that balances courage and finesse.
Aunt Nin’s Lesson on Assertiveness
"No” is Not a Rejection. It's Declaration of Value
Your integrity isn’t for negotiation, and protecting that is powerful. Those around you who feel slighted by your “no” may not care to protect your boundaries. Let ‘em go.
Diana’s Lesson on Assertiveness
The Art of Being Heard
Effective communication is about resonance. Direct, clear and concise speech coupled with active listening limits opportunity for confusion and increases opportunity for accountability.
Maria’s Lesson on Assertiveness
Body Language is Our Unspoken Command
The way you occupy space speaks well before you do. A confident posture, direct eye contact, purposeful gestures – these are the unspoken words that script authority. Body language isn’t about intimidation, but an assertion of your presence.
Mom's Lesson on Assertiveness
Don't Scream For You Supper.
If someone repeatedly ignores our boundaries, we are left with a choice to either ‘scream for our supper ‘ (i.e., desperately fight to be listened to), or accept a person for who they are and create independence from them (i.e., bounce, leave, kick rocks, make like a banana and split.)
Crystal's Lesson on Assertiveness Skills
Negotiation doesn’t mean You're Giving Up Control
Hoarding control shows that you lack confidence in your ability to keep it. Flexibility displays confidence in your ability to adapt to any situation. Assertive women don’t need to control everything to feel secure, they find confidence in the security within.
Assertiveness begins with a simple, profound acknowledgment: You are valuable. Your perception of your worth is the blueprint which assertive structures are built. It’s recognizing your contributions aren’t minor footnotes, but essential chapters in your narrative.
Each of these women display their assertiveness in vastly different ways. And although assertiveness may look different in each of us, and may be more present in varying situations, the purpose of assertiveness is the same:
TO ACKNOWLEDGE & HONOR YOUR WORTH
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